QUEER AS STUDENTS (Pg 1)

Two students share their experiences and anxieties
when they came out of the proverbial closet…

"For me, being gay has been a really big thing. It's been a really big part of my life but it's not my whole life so to speak. I knew I was a lesbian at a very early age. Even when I was about 10, I knew I was different. It certainly wasn't a sexual thing back then, but more a feeling of emotion and identification. Sometimes it can be annoying when people ask me how I knew that I was gay. I often feel like asking them how they know that they're not! It really just is one of things where you just know.

"I 'came out' when I'd just turned 18 and was in my first year here at Sunderland. It felt the perfect time to tell everyone as is often the case for a lot of people once they enter university life. There was absolutely no way I could have told anyone while still at school. That would have been impossible given the immaturity of a lot of my school mates and even the teachers. I don't think it would have been accepted anyway cos of the section 28 Act. The support system would have been non-existent.

"When I did decide to 'come out' I had to feel the time was right. I had started going to various pubs and clubs and began settling into this way of life. I had also met some other lesbians who were very supportive, so, at last I told my parents and friends. My parents were quite shocked and a little confused for a while, but my dad, who I'm close to, told me later that he'd already suspected!

"Eventually everyone came to terms with my revelation but my dad was the only one who'd suspected. My friends didn't have the faintest idea and were really very shocked and in a state of disbelief for a while. But everyone was really supportive.

"When I read other people's stories about coming out I feel very lucky. I know it could have been very different for me and that I could have faced some difficult situations. Not all my friends know about my sexuality yet though so tough times may still lie ahead. I don't see why anyone should give me a hard time though. If they are true friends they'll accept it and be happy for me.

"I came out with great ease really and everyone I've told so far have reacted positively. I also have a close friend who's also gay and he's been a great help and support.

"About six months after I came out, I met and fell in love with a woman. That was nearly two years ago and we're really happy together and she gets on really well with my family and friends. I think my experience just show that being gay doesn't necessarily go hand in hand with heart break and pain. To me, it's exactly the same as being straight. You've got the same feelings and want the same things. At the end of the everyone just wants to be accepted and loved."

Kay

Click here for Greg's story....